4 Steps to Achieving Greatness in Your Life

As a child, we have big dreams. We want to save the world; we want to make a difference to the lives of others. However, as time passes, we find ourselves falling back to the same, old, predictable routine- in a job we do not like, relationships that are falling apart, and dreams placed on standby.

What happened along the way?

Let me first cite you an example of mine.

I have wanted to start a blog for the longest time. However, I never got far.

On several occasions, I was all hyped up and decided that this would be THE DAY I would start. I would then go on to create a webpage, spending lots of time deciding on a theme for the blog and write my first entry. I never got past 3 entries. After 3 entries at most, my blog would be abandoned, neglected, and forgotten. I just got too caught up with my life and other things. There was never time to sustain my efforts.

Have you ever encountered similar problems? Working on something but never completing it?

Wondering how you can get things done?

1.Have a plan

First, it is important for you to know your end goal. What is it that you want to achieve? Choose something that drives you, something that excites you, because that probably is it. Set achievable and specific goal targets which you will have to hit along the way, and just do it. Easy as it may sound, it is not. As you are about to embark on your project, you will find many things holding you back.

    2.Identify what is holding you back

To be successful in life, it is important to build your awareness. You have to know what exactly is holding you back. These are your defenses. These are what will stop you from achieving great things in life. Your defenses will appear whenever you are about to embark on something big, something that is out of your comfort zone. When you face your defenses, you will know you are on the right path.

This is not the time to give up. Building awareness of your defenses will allow you to be mindful and not be stopped by them.

For me, some defense mechanisms I use when faced with an uncomfortable situation or when asked to do things I do not like would be- becoming sleepy, mind blanking out, acting ignorant, or rationalizing myself out of the discomfort. No doubt, this temporarily solves the problem; however, this also results in a greater accumulation of problems. It’s like you are digging a deeper hole for yourself each time you give in to your defense mechanism.

Returning to the example of my blog, I have identified 3 things that were holding me back. I will talk a little about them as you might be able to relate to some.

      a.       Fear of Judgment

I procrastinated a lot when I wanted to start a blog because subconsciously I was afraid of judgment. I have been too used to blending into the background, and not calling attention to myself. Starting a blog and writing my thoughts would be opening my heart to the world. This was something that scared me. I did not like that idea because I cannot control how others perceive me. I am afraid of being judged. What if people do not like what they read? What if they judge me for my views? On the other hand, I was also worried no one will read my blog and I would judge myself. Complicated mind indeed.

After some reflections, I realized that this fear lurking in my subconscious could be something that is holding me back. This fear is irrational because honestly, no one cares. As long as I did not say anything to offend anyone, I am entitled to have my say. Identifying this fear allowed me to debunk it and stop it from preventing me from achieving success.

Lesson learnt: We all have our own fears. It is whether you are willing to step up and have the courage to face your fears. Need I say more? Those with the most courage wins.

      b.      Unrealistic expectations

As you know, I wanted to start a blog. However, after posting a few entries, I would start comparing my blog to those very developed blogs which has thousands of viewers. I had unrealistic expectations on how fast my blog should grow.

Thus, it was discouraging when page views did not increase as much as I would like it to. I made the mistake of linking my capabilities to my performance. I like to set really high, hard-to-achieve goals for myself, and when I do not achieve them, I beat myself up. Sadistic as it may seem, this is how many of us operates. This leads to a downward spiral of confidence and soon, I start to lose motivation because I start to believe I am not good enough.

Lesson learnt: Do set realistic and measurable goals along your path to success so that you can keep yourself in check and not be discouraged.

      c.       Lack of belief

I realized I also lack faith in my own abilities. I did not believe I could do it. I cannot imagine myself being successful. That is a big red-flag there. If I can’t even believe in myself, who will believe in me? Whatever you decide to embark on, you have to believe in yourself. You have to believe in your own capabilities, because, believe it or not, you can do it. It is whether you want to or not, and how much you are willing to sacrifice to achieve what you want. Nothing is too big. If man can land on the moon even in the 1960s, what can you not do? Nothing is impossible. Impossible is nothing.

After some soul-searching, I have learnt to believe in myself and love myself for who I am.

Lesson learnt: You are limited by your own beliefs. Do not limit yourself with limiting beliefs. Believe in yourself because if you don’t, who will believe in you?

    3.Come up with motivators that will keep your defenses in check

After identifying what holds you back, it would be useful to come up with a list of things that motivates you. For me, it would be happiness, inspiring lives of others, making a difference, and the idea of creation. It is important to write a list of what motivates you as this would be what gives you strength. It will help you to fight your inner demons. Develop these strengths fully, and they will serve as energizer batteries which will give you the much needed boost when you feel like giving up.

    4.Get a buddy to monitor you

Sometimes it’s hard to achieve GREATNESS on your own. You will need support. Even great men from history had the support from a woman (ref. Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill, Chapter on Sexual Transmutation). Find time to share your plan/project with your buddy. Find someone trustable and responsible. He will be in charge of reminding you of your goals and provide you with the much needed support. Humans are social animals. We operate best in a group. It is time to get in tune with this social instinct and for once, reach out to our loved ones and friends.

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I wish you all the best in your journey to become successful!

Like you, I was once obstructed by my fears and doubts. But now, I have decided to take charge of my life, and change my life. I am slowly getting my act up. I am also still in the process of working on myself. I hope you will continue to support me through this journey to help weave my dream into reality.